RATED NC-17! Before you view.
Faerie Tales **NEW LAYOUT** Chap 3 finished!
Faerie Tales **NEW LAYOUT** Chap 3 finished!
Finally I can post the comic up here! Chapter 1 is finished and online! Any comments or crits are greatly appreciated.
RATED NC-17! Before you view.
RATED NC-17! Before you view.
Last edited by Ahro on Thu Sep 22, 2005 4:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Soup Goblin
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I'll give a more detailed thought when I'm not exhausted and unable to sleep, but I will lay out a pro now...your art is awesome. I really really enjoy the pencil, and the overall design and style. Beautiful Beautiful work.
Caught in the headlamp glare of your own blinding vanity/Mesmerised by the stare of your shallow personality
Gorging the junk food of flattery you drag your fat ego around/Everyone floored by the battering you give to whoever's around
Oh Narcissus you petulant child admiring yourself in the curve of my eyes/Oh Narcissus you angel beguiled unsated by self you do nothing but die
Gorging the junk food of flattery you drag your fat ego around/Everyone floored by the battering you give to whoever's around
Oh Narcissus you petulant child admiring yourself in the curve of my eyes/Oh Narcissus you angel beguiled unsated by self you do nothing but die
Yey! I'm so glad to hear you all are enjoying the art and the story that is available at the moment. ^_^ As far as storyline goes:
A life through a faeries eyes - not the cute an adorable flower-clad faeries, but real things, flesh and blood. Abandoned at birth, leading a life of hardship and pain, only to be soothed by a friend or two. Faerie Tales - because not everything has a happy ending.
Very brief but the story is so long and crazy that it would be hard to sum it any further and not give away anything.
I can assure you that the story is complete so we aren't makeing it up as we go along. ^_-
Any further crits or comments are welcome!
A life through a faeries eyes - not the cute an adorable flower-clad faeries, but real things, flesh and blood. Abandoned at birth, leading a life of hardship and pain, only to be soothed by a friend or two. Faerie Tales - because not everything has a happy ending.
Very brief but the story is so long and crazy that it would be hard to sum it any further and not give away anything.
I can assure you that the story is complete so we aren't makeing it up as we go along. ^_-Any further crits or comments are welcome!
"I am your 80s montage."
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Twentyfour
- Regular Poster
- Posts: 394
- Joined: Fri Jan 01, 1999 4:00 pm
- Location: Eastern Canada
Just skimmin through before I eat my lunch.
You have some good pencil skills but I think you may need to vary up the pencils you use. All of the artwork feels like it was done with the same pencil and the characters details(and even the characters themselves) get lost in the mess of grey. Not to say you aren't talented, it's just that I'm losing the good details to the rough shading work.
The hair seems to be the most distracting the female character's(you'll have to forgive me, I don't have time to run through the entire archives before the pizza is cooked)hair is darker, but her hair seems to be drawn with individual strokes that in the end looks either 'okay'(top of page for Aug. 15th) to a distracting solid coloured mess(bottom of page for Aug. 15th). I really feel you could avoid all of that inconsistancy with just drawing the key points of the hair(outline, hairline, and extra details that are required to maintain the personality of the hair) and then some quick even shading(keep the shaind in the same direction otherwise it will look like a haystack, or you are trying to give the impression of a flow to the hair, if you wish to give that impression pay strict attentionto the direction of the shading then)
There are some anatomical issues that jumped out at me when I was skimming. The update for Aug. 8th stood out right away, the left hand is backwards(looks like a right hand in that position), honest mistake but something to keep an eye out for. July 18th, top of the page, the forehead is enormous compared to the ones used in the rest of the page. I think you were trying to show his head tilted forward(?) but the features shouldn't slide down the face like that(again, honest mistake, just make sure you learn from it)
Overall I can't say I'd keep reading after this point. The style didn't catch me and half of what I saw was fan art. I will say I believe you have some real talent but the artistic medium is obscuring it a bit. I highly recommend either getting an electric sharpener and using it constantly(they sound annoying as all hell but I learned to love em cleaning up animation) or switch to mechanical pencils for a bit to help you learn to vary your pressure(I do that every few months just to keep my skills up).
Good luck with your artwork and keep your pencil sharp!
You have some good pencil skills but I think you may need to vary up the pencils you use. All of the artwork feels like it was done with the same pencil and the characters details(and even the characters themselves) get lost in the mess of grey. Not to say you aren't talented, it's just that I'm losing the good details to the rough shading work.
The hair seems to be the most distracting the female character's(you'll have to forgive me, I don't have time to run through the entire archives before the pizza is cooked)hair is darker, but her hair seems to be drawn with individual strokes that in the end looks either 'okay'(top of page for Aug. 15th) to a distracting solid coloured mess(bottom of page for Aug. 15th). I really feel you could avoid all of that inconsistancy with just drawing the key points of the hair(outline, hairline, and extra details that are required to maintain the personality of the hair) and then some quick even shading(keep the shaind in the same direction otherwise it will look like a haystack, or you are trying to give the impression of a flow to the hair, if you wish to give that impression pay strict attentionto the direction of the shading then)
There are some anatomical issues that jumped out at me when I was skimming. The update for Aug. 8th stood out right away, the left hand is backwards(looks like a right hand in that position), honest mistake but something to keep an eye out for. July 18th, top of the page, the forehead is enormous compared to the ones used in the rest of the page. I think you were trying to show his head tilted forward(?) but the features shouldn't slide down the face like that(again, honest mistake, just make sure you learn from it)
Overall I can't say I'd keep reading after this point. The style didn't catch me and half of what I saw was fan art. I will say I believe you have some real talent but the artistic medium is obscuring it a bit. I highly recommend either getting an electric sharpener and using it constantly(they sound annoying as all hell but I learned to love em cleaning up animation) or switch to mechanical pencils for a bit to help you learn to vary your pressure(I do that every few months just to keep my skills up).
Good luck with your artwork and keep your pencil sharp!
Wow. I super appreciate all of your constructive crits! ^^ I'll have to tell the author to lighten up on her shadding jobs. I never did like how she shadded the hair but I never argued because she's the author, and the last thing I want to do is get in a fight when this is going so well. loltwentyfour wrote:Just skimmin through before I eat my lunch.
You have some good pencil skills but I think you may need to vary up the pencils you use. All of the artwork feels like it was done with the same pencil and the characters details(and even the characters themselves) get lost in the mess of grey. Not to say you aren't talented, it's just that I'm losing the good details to the rough shading work.
The hair seems to be the most distracting the female character's(you'll have to forgive me, I don't have time to run through the entire archives before the pizza is cooked)hair is darker, but her hair seems to be drawn with individual strokes that in the end looks either 'okay'(top of page for Aug. 15th) to a distracting solid coloured mess(bottom of page for Aug. 15th). I really feel you could avoid all of that inconsistancy with just drawing the key points of the hair(outline, hairline, and extra details that are required to maintain the personality of the hair) and then some quick even shading(keep the shaind in the same direction otherwise it will look like a haystack, or you are trying to give the impression of a flow to the hair, if you wish to give that impression pay strict attentionto the direction of the shading then)
There are some anatomical issues that jumped out at me when I was skimming. The update for Aug. 8th stood out right away, the left hand is backwards(looks like a right hand in that position), honest mistake but something to keep an eye out for. July 18th, top of the page, the forehead is enormous compared to the ones used in the rest of the page. I think you were trying to show his head tilted forward(?) but the features shouldn't slide down the face like that(again, honest mistake, just make sure you learn from it)
Overall I can't say I'd keep reading after this point. The style didn't catch me and half of what I saw was fan art. I will say I believe you have some real talent but the artistic medium is obscuring it a bit. I highly recommend either getting an electric sharpener and using it constantly(they sound annoying as all hell but I learned to love em cleaning up animation) or switch to mechanical pencils for a bit to help you learn to vary your pressure(I do that every few months just to keep my skills up).
Good luck with your artwork and keep your pencil sharp!
We have a poll up at the moment pointing out whether or not we should switch to ink and tone or leave the same. I personally want to go to ink and tone but we want to wait to see what the majority want. Odds are people are going to want the ink and tone done.
Well, once again, thank you so much for pointing out the mistakes. I'm sorry you're not to keen on reading any further, but maybe while we go through improvements I'll bump this thread and perhaps you might spot it and come back for more. *shrug* ^_^
Anyways, thank you again. And I'll keep your points as far as the anatomy in mind.
"I am your 80s montage."
Well thank you very much. ^^ I'm glad you like that feature. That's one of my pet peeves when going through one of my fav webcomics, when they only have the next, prev, etc buttons on the top, so you have to scroll back up to go to the next one, or visa versa.pylon wrote:This isn't really related to your comic per se, but I kinda like your webpage layout. It was easy to navigate, and I really like the fact you put the first, last, next, etc buttons at the top and bottom.
I will be changing the layout soon but it will still be easy to navigate. ^^ I'm glad the layout that's up now is easy to navigate.
"I am your 80s montage."
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Akujintails
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- Joined: Sun Aug 21, 2005 11:27 pm
- Location: England
Banner
You should probably make your banner a link to your comic, it'd be annoying to have to find this specific topic, if people see your banner or hear about Faerie Tales, and want to check out your comic, or anything, nyu.