The Most Depressing Essay Ever!

Collapse · Post by **Collapse** » Tue Jan 11, 2005 11:34 pm

In English, we have to do the stupid bullshit essay about an epiphany we had, just like every goddamn year. I think that's the only purpose of the autobiographical incident. Why do we have to do it every year? ARG!

I was just going to write something about how I never have epiphanies, but I decided not to do that. I also didn't want to make something up, though I don't really know why. I thought for a long time, and three days after the rough draft was due I finally came up with something. Two more days and I got around to writing it.

It sucks, but I don't even care.
---

Realization

BOMC · Post by **BOMC** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 4:14 am

That's more of a short story than a essay, isn't it?

Still, I like it.

Terotrous · Post by **Terotrous** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 6:23 am

There was this one shining moment when I realized I didn't have any ephinanies, and it changed my life forever.

Warren · Post by **Warren** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 6:46 am

Dude... just make something up. That's what I did.

Collapse · Post by **Collapse** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 7:22 am

I didn't want to make anything up. Dunno why.

Plus, if I made something up, I might have to deal with questions about the made-up scenario from the teacher.

Thanks, Grace

.

Phact0rri · Post by **Phact0rri** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 7:34 am

I remember doing a non-fictional narrative in highschool about me getting abducted by space aliens. it was so far fetched and ludicrace... and some how my teacher said not a thing and gave me full marks. that was the funniest thing ever.

Nanda · Post by **Nanda** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 8:04 am

Generally speaking, if you write it well and properly, they don't really care. My mother once handed in a thesis on why 'you should never dye your poodle purple' and received full marks.

Protectmyballs · Post by **Protectmyballs** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 8:42 am

We had to write daily 'journal entries' based on a one or two sentence prompt on the board in english class senior year of high school. I always wrote the most ludicrous things and got full credit. The one that stands out in my mind, the prompt was "Out, out damn spot!" (from Macbeth when he is tryign to get blood off his hands) I wrote about tampon commecials. When the teacher said it didnt relate to the prompt I said "Yes it does." After a few seconds he started laughing, then immedietly moved to the next student.

Dutch! · Post by **Dutch!** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 12:37 pm

Well that almost made me want to slit my wrists...

But speaking on assignments (yep, that's what we called them down here, because we can use bigger words) in highschool we suspected that some of the teachers basically just looked at the work to make sure there was enough of it, gave it a tick and handed it back. Especially those that were just work requirements and not going towards our marks.

So I littered one English assignment with words such as banana and pickled onion and stuff, and even slipped one sentence in there asking if the teacher was reading it. I had another real copy prepared to hand in when she found me out, but strangely I didn't need to use it...

Jha'Meia · Post by **Jha'Meia** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 5:01 pm

protectmyballs wrote:The one that stands out in my mind, the prompt was "Out, out damn spot!" (from Macbeth when he is tryign to get blood off his hands) I wrote about tampon commecials.

Lady Macbeth

But I can see how it relates to tampons! ^^

Steverules · Post by **Steverules** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 5:15 pm

We need to change the name of this forum from "Off Topic Junk" to "Help Collapse find love". And I think we have. Collapse, meet GoT, GoT, Collapse. Now you two know what to do.

Steverules · Post by **Steverules** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 5:25 pm

Oh, I don't know collapse. I can make it more depressing.
[quote="collapse"]

Realization

Smight · Post by **Smight** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 6:07 pm

You're baaaaaaaad.

*Sheepish Grin*

Toxic · Post by **Toxic** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 9:20 pm

I don't think teachers today realize that most teenagers lead rather unremarkable lives. Oh well, you can always make it up.

Dutch! · Post by **Dutch!** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 9:21 pm

Heh...I'm not wading into that one...

Nyke · Post by **Nyke** » Wed Jan 12, 2005 10:43 pm

steverules wrote:We need to change the name of this forum from "Off Topic Junk" to "Help Collapse find love". And I think we have. Collapse, meet GoT, GoT, Collapse. Now you two know what to do.

Make a statue of me, pronto!

BOMC · Post by **BOMC** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 4:30 am

steverules wrote: My friends tell me sheep make great lovers because they can't say "NO."

McDuffies · Post by **McDuffies** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 5:06 am

steverules wrote:We need to change the name of this forum from "Off Topic Junk" to "Help Collapse find love". And I think we have. Collapse, meet GoT, GoT, Collapse. Now you two know what to do.

As long as he stays away from my little sister.

Phact0rri · Post by **Phact0rri** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 8:14 am

we could always sign collapse up to a whole bunch of internet dating services.

Col · Post by **Col** » Thu Jan 13, 2005 1:12 pm

As if relationships in junior high mean anything...

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The Most Depressing Essay Ever!

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