Fight scene! Please critique ... [new pic o9.1o.o6]

Twotimingpete · Post by **Twotimingpete** » Tue Aug 01, 2006 10:27 pm

main problem is the bottom character's face still looks bored and isn't looking at his enemy. change the face on the bottom fighter and it'd be much more effective.

Biev · Post by **Biev** » Wed Aug 02, 2006 9:58 am

The top guy's head is still not facing the opponent, and he's in a weird place. Looks like his leg is getting cut right now. I don't think you should add the weapons until you're sure about the position.

Bluebug · Post by **Bluebug** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 3:15 pm

BlackSparrow: Thanks for the tip. I wasn't even thinking about how the top guy would actually attack the bottom guy, I just drew the first thing that came to mind. But now I realize that in the first draft, the way he's swinging his weapon wouldn't even result in a strike ... at least in this draft, if the bottom guy wasn't blocking, he'd be sliced in the head. Hmm ... though I think the wheel of death still needs to be moved slightly to the left. Anyway ... I'm hoping it'll look like the top guy is actually swinging his weapon when I draw his hand properly. He'll be gripping it palm towards the viewer.

twotimingpete: He looks less bored in the closeup. And I tend to be able to create a lot of emotion when shading.

Biev: Technically he was performing a sneak attack from slightly behind the bottom character, but I see what you mean. I changed the angle of attack to a direct attack. Putting in the weapons gives me visual cues. *shrug* It's much easier for me to create the scene that way, despite needing to manipulate everything multiple times.

Here's the edit: (his legs are still screwy ... I have to do this piecemeal cuz it gives me some time away from the pic ... and thus less bias, plus I don't have all day to work on this -_-;)

Now the trouble is ... in about two seconds the bottom guy is totally dead ...

Snackbot · Post by **Snackbot** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 5:12 pm

bluebug wrote:Now the trouble is ... in about two seconds the bottom guy is totally dead ...

Not if the bottom guy is really fast and awesome, and can block both attacks one after the other.

Johndar · Post by **Johndar** » Thu Aug 03, 2006 11:25 pm

bluebug wrote:Now the trouble is ... in about two seconds the bottom guy is totally dead ...

If I'm not mistaken, those two characters are Riku and Axel, from the Kingdom Hearts series. If that's the case, I'm sure Riku could just pull of some sort of reaction command to avoid it and counter attack. If not, it would just be a bit of hp loss, no biggie. Just use cure or sumthing. Axel wasn't that hard to beat.

All jokes aside, it looks pretty good to me. It's nice and dynamic, like they're clashing in mid air. All the problems have pretty much already been adressed by other people.

Boogiebop · Post by **Boogiebop** » Fri Aug 04, 2006 1:55 am

Snackbot wrote:
bluebug wrote:Now the trouble is ... in about two seconds the bottom guy is totally dead ...
Not if the bottom guy is really fast and awesome, and can block both attacks one after the other.

Hell if he manages to block just one of them the flying mime is going to impale himself on his own spikey tamborines.

Bluebug · Post by **Bluebug** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 2:32 pm

Johndar wrote: If I'm not mistaken, those two characters are Riku and Axel, from the Kingdom Hearts series. If that's the case, I'm sure Riku could just pull of some sort of reaction command to avoid it and counter attack. If not, it would just be a bit of hp loss, no biggie. Just use cure or sumthing. Axel wasn't that hard to beat.

All jokes aside, it looks pretty good to me. It's nice and dynamic, like they're clashing in mid air. All the problems have pretty much already been adressed by other people.

heh. I was wondering if anyone would actually recognize them. What does a reaction command look like? Would you be able to find me a picture of one? Then maybe I can paint it in around his free hand, so Riku doesn't look like he's about to die.

Here's the latest version. I'm very happy with it. A gargantuan thank you to everyone who gave me tips. I hope nothing else is wrong with it at this point!

Johndar · Post by **Johndar** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 3:17 pm

http://kingdomhearts.neoseeker.com/imag ... d_mini.png

Sadly, this is the best pic I could find for a reaction command. They ususally appear on the target though, and It might just get in the way. You could try it out though. By the way i like the Bg, well done!

Biev · Post by **Biev** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 8:37 pm

I'm amazed at how much this has improved since page 1 ^.^ Good job! And yes you understood what I meant and it works now that you repositioned him.

The background helps, before I saw it I thought the first guy was on the floor (on his knees), that changes the whole dynamic of the scene!

Bluebug · Post by **Bluebug** » Wed Aug 09, 2006 6:35 pm

Johndar: Thanks for the link. I might just cheat and make up my own "reaction command" aka "the glowing hand of death"

Biev: Thanks, that really means a lot to me. The best compliment is when I can improve on what's wrong.

Bluebug · Post by **Bluebug** » Sat Sep 09, 2006 1:03 pm

I've got another image that needs critiquing. Already I think his head is too big. Sorry bout the sketchiness. I'll post up an ink later so it's more clear what everything is. But critiques are welcome at this point.

Just to make it clear, he's falling through the air, he's not standing on one leg.

Black Sparrow · Post by **Black Sparrow** » Sun Sep 10, 2006 7:36 am

Yeah, the head is a little big when compared to the rest of his body. I'm also wondering at the lack of definition on the bottom of his right foot. It looks a smudge too flat... like foot-shaped shoes.

Also, what way is he falling? The sleeve on his right arm ssems to suggest downward, but the bottom of his jacket suggests more of a backward motion... and the tie around his waist suggests no motion at all.

(That's Toshiro Hitsugaya from Bleach, right? He's my favorite character

)

Bluebug · Post by **Bluebug** » Sun Sep 10, 2006 8:37 am

Thanks, Black Sparrow. I completely missed the inconsistencies in his sleeves and belt, thanks for pointing that out. I'm not too sure what to do with his foot to make it look more curved, other than shading it. Hopefully that'll work out without me having to alter the lineart.

And yup, it's Hitsugaya. I stopped watching Bleach before I had a chance to really see his character do much, but after looking at a lot of reference pics, I think he's my favorite character in Bleach too

Second to Kon (when he was funny).

Bluebug · Post by **Bluebug** » Sun Sep 10, 2006 10:16 am

Here's a funky angle shot of Byakuya. It's supposed to be a bird's eye view but I'm not sure if his lower half quite works out. Any suggestions would be muchly appreciated.

edit: Sorry, I should explain the pic. This guy should be holding a sword in his fisted hand. I haven't drawn it in yet because I'm having trouble getting his attacker drawn right.

EvilChihuahua · Post by **EvilChihuahua** » Sun Sep 10, 2006 1:15 pm

Dangit bluebug, stop making me feel inferior!!!

Your art seriously rocks, man.