Noses Optional?!?

ThatLargePhantomSmell · Tue Dec 13, 2005 9:48 pm

Here's a question!! Have you ever been at work and wished your own nose was optional?

Like when someone really destroy's the bathroom?!?
Or when old people breath on you?
Or when coworkers spread their foul smells like it was air freshener?

I have.......!!

I would like a little removeable nose that I can just choose not to smell you today!!

If I were God!!

All creatures would have Optional Noses....and boobs!!

Out-TLPS

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Wed Dec 14, 2005 11:10 am

Optional Boobs?

That puts an interesting picture in my head.

Anyway, yes, I agree with you.

I work in a public library. I've had many a scary experience after certain co-workers leave the staff restroom and I enter...making a beeline for the can of air freshener.

The public restrooms get "evil" too.

Then there are the library customers who need a refresher course in basic hygiene.

Yes...having an optional nose would be very handy sometimes.

Dennis

Special K · Post by **Special K** » Wed Dec 14, 2005 5:02 pm

People apparently have the ability to forget how to go to the bathroom properly when they are in a public restroom. For some reason, everyone in the mall uses B&N's potty as if it was their own parade grounds. I mean, toliet paper confetti every which way and for the love of god, QUIT PEEING ON THE SEATS! I DO NOT GET PAID ENOUGH TO CLEAN UP YOUR URINE!!

[/rant]

E~Man · Post by **E~Man** » Wed Dec 14, 2005 5:10 pm

Special K wrote:People apparently have the ability to forget how to go to the bathroom properly when they are in a public restroom...

Hell, not to mention at work!

Co-workers suck!

Kubey · Post by **Kubey** » Wed Dec 14, 2005 6:40 pm

Or when people crap so much diarrhea into the fucking toilet that you have to put on gloves and put it into a bag just so you can flush the toilet??? I certainly do not get paid enough to touch people's diarrhea feces. Stupid Savannah BAM customers. I hate them all!!! Grrrr.

FredZor · Post by **FredZor** » Thu Dec 15, 2005 8:08 am

Here's a horror story from the gas station company I used to work for...luckily, I did not have to witness this.
This one girl I was training with previously worked for the company before, but had to train again, because she hadn't worked there for so long. She was telling us about one night she and someone else were closing up. Some chick, who was unbelievably high off of who knows what, had to use the bathroom. When she came out covered in her own poo, the workers went to go see what had happened. There was crap all over the place...including the ceiling!
Since they were closing, and didn't want to stay the extra time to clean it up, they ended up leaving it for the morning crew to take care of it.
~now feels dirty all over~

Kubey · Post by **Kubey** » Thu Dec 15, 2005 9:20 am

What about the time someone pooed in the closet at the candle store? ^_^

FredZor · Post by **FredZor** » Thu Dec 15, 2005 12:17 pm

Luckily, I wasn't there for that.
St. Pattie's Day is the equivelant to New Orlean's Mardi Gra (I'm sure I spelled something wrong, please don't kill me Kristy and Cathe, remember, I am a Damn Yankee) Either way, the holiday has been completely ruined for me.
So, River Street gets over crowded with tourists and residents drinking green beer, buying beads, and over all, being stupid. This one lady came into the New Store (which is now being turned into a coffee shop), managed to get past the owners, and their parents (because they were all drinking as well), and thought (as many people do) that the closet with the electrical box was a bathroom. Yes...there's a sink that's hooked up to nothing in there, but that's still not enough to qualify as a friggin' bathroom!
Sometime later, the lady comes back, telling the owners that she left her purse in their bathroom. When they said that they didn't have a bathroom, she argued that they did, and pointed out the closet. When they went to investigate, they found piss and crap all over the floor, and thus told the lady that she had to clean it up. For all I know, she refused and left in a huff, and the owners were left clean it up themselves. Kinda wish they took that much care to the one bathroom they do have at the Older Store...who knows when it was last cleaned/fixed/whatever!

Special K · Post by **Special K** » Thu Dec 15, 2005 1:49 pm

St. Patrick's Day here is nothing like Mardi Gras. Mardi Gras is way kick your pants off better.

E~Man · Post by **E~Man** » Thu Dec 15, 2005 5:21 pm

OK then...I never ever want to have direct contact with customers...

ThatLargePhantomSmell · Thu Dec 15, 2005 9:56 pm

It's nice to know that real people live in this town as well as all the weirdo's!!
OK..so how about this one.

Old people farts!! And then they won't even claim it. They just look like you would be a really bad boy/girl for even bringing it up!!

And women's toliets are by far worse than the men's.....

Anyway.....I think that if you are feeling sick....you know in a diarahea way...stay home. And if you have a tendency to be irreagular....at least be clean about it...that's all.....

Oh yaeh...."and Charlie...light a match!!"

Out-TLPS

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:38 am

Special K wrote:People apparently have the ability to forget how to go to the bathroom properly when they are in a public restroom. For some reason, everyone in the mall uses B&N's potty as if it was their own parade grounds. I mean, toliet paper confetti every which way and for the love of god, QUIT PEEING ON THE SEATS! I DO NOT GET PAID ENOUGH TO CLEAN UP YOUR URINE!!

[/rant]

Ugh!

Yeah, I hear ya, Kristy!

Before I landed my current library gig, I worked at a local Kmart for 9 1/2 years (The same store Fred worked at for a year some time after I quit). Yeah, I was there for quite a stretch but it helped pay the bills when I was in college and grad school.

Anyway, my first year there, I was a "runner", which basically translates to store slave. I got stuck cleaning up some absolutely ungodly messes in the bathroom...and on the sales floor.

My SECOND day of work, someone actually crapped on the floor and used some pants in menswear to clean up! I absolutely swear this is true! I have other stories just as gross as that.

Now, I mean no offense to women but easily 90% of my cleanups were in the Ladies Room. Oh the things I could relate here! But I'd be grossing everyone out.

My final 8 years, I worked in the Home Improvement department and I still periodically got nailed for cleanup detail...Kmart was too damn cheap to hire enough help most of the time so I'd get paged.

I've been away from the store for 11 years and I still recall lots of the gross stuff I saw at work. It's absolutely amazing what people do in public.

Now, at the library, where I'm outnumbered by women, I have to contend with co-workers with hygiene problems.

Our public ladies room is still nasty at times. Is there something about women and bathrooms I need to know about? I've had to plunge a few toilets...because I'm the "guy" and the maintenance man isn't around. As a "guy" I also have to kill spiders and bugs.

I've escaped the really evil moments in the ladies room, I'm too cranky for this stuff now and I'm not going to do it.

And, no, guys aren't saints, either. The public mens room looks as if someone's been marking their territory sometimes. As I said, I work with a majority of women, so I have a habit of lowering the seat when I'm done in the bathroom. Yes, I'll make a wifey happy someday, whenever I manage to find a wifey that is...

People really just don't care what they do in public, I guess.

Dennis

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:48 am

E~Man wrote:
Special K wrote:People apparently have the ability to forget how to go to the bathroom properly when they are in a public restroom...
Hell, not to mention at work!

Co-workers suck!

Again, I agree.

Dennis

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:52 am

Kubey wrote:Or when people crap so much diarrhea into the fucking toilet that you have to put on gloves and put it into a bag just so you can flush the toilet??? I certainly do not get paid enough to touch people's diarrhea feces. Stupid Savannah BAM customers. I hate them all!!! Grrrr.

AAAAAH!

I just had a Kmart flashback! *Shudder!*

I've actually done that too. I've cleaned up more crap (literally!) than I care to mention.

Dennis

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:55 am

FredZor wrote:Here's a horror story from the gas station company I used to work for...luckily, I did not have to witness this.
This one girl I was training with previously worked for the company before, but had to train again, because she hadn't worked there for so long. She was telling us about one night she and someone else were closing up. Some chick, who was unbelievably high off of who knows what, had to use the bathroom. When she came out covered in her own poo, the workers went to go see what had happened. There was crap all over the place...including the ceiling!
Since they were closing, and didn't want to stay the extra time to clean it up, they ended up leaving it for the morning crew to take care of it.
~now feels dirty all over~

Ewwww! That's one story, I'm glad you didn't share with me, Fred.

The ceiling?

Dennis...in need of a hot shower.

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:58 am

FredZor wrote:Luckily, I wasn't there for that.
St. Pattie's Day is the equivelant to New Orlean's Mardi Gra (I'm sure I spelled something wrong, please don't kill me Kristy and Cathe, remember, I am a Damn Yankee) Either way, the holiday has been completely ruined for me.
So, River Street gets over crowded with tourists and residents drinking green beer, buying beads, and over all, being stupid. This one lady came into the New Store (which is now being turned into a coffee shop), managed to get past the owners, and their parents (because they were all drinking as well), and thought (as many people do) that the closet with the electrical box was a bathroom. Yes...there's a sink that's hooked up to nothing in there, but that's still not enough to qualify as a friggin' bathroom!
Sometime later, the lady comes back, telling the owners that she left her purse in their bathroom. When they said that they didn't have a bathroom, she argued that they did, and pointed out the closet. When they went to investigate, they found piss and crap all over the floor, and thus told the lady that she had to clean it up. For all I know, she refused and left in a huff, and the owners were left clean it up themselves. Kinda wish they took that much care to the one bathroom they do have at the Older Store...who knows when it was last cleaned/fixed/whatever!

Good gods!

I've heard some of your St Patty's Day stories before, Fred, but I missed that one.

Dennis

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 8:59 am

Special K wrote:St. Patrick's Day here is nothing like Mardi Gras. Mardi Gras is way kick your pants off better.

I've never been to Mardi Gras...or Louisiana, for that matter.

Once things get rebuilt, I hope to visit some day.

Dennis...craving beads all of a sudden

Dennis Kininger · Post by **Dennis Kininger** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 9:01 am

E~Man wrote: OK then...I never ever want to have direct contact with customers...

I have to talk to them since I work in a public place but certain ones I won't touch *shudder*

Dennis

Special K · Post by **Special K** » Fri Dec 16, 2005 5:28 pm

Ya know Dennis, you could just reply to everything in one post rather than taking up the whole board. ^_^

ThatLargePhantomSmell · Sat Dec 17, 2005 6:30 pm

Wow.....37 replys by one guy........I agree Special K!!

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Noses Optional?!?

Noses Optional?!?

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Yes Please!!