Stupidest Assignment Ever

[Nyke]

I don't know. I've been lucky to have decent teachers, especially in writing. The worst I've had was an art teacher obsessed with water scenes.

My problems are mainly with the school, as they seem to schedule all the classes I want at the EXACT SAME TIME, and they only mix around classes to put the next class you want at THAT TIME.

[CJBurgandy]

the only teacher I could truely remember not liking her assignments weren't because the assignments were unconventual or hard, but because it didn't matter what you wrote, if you weren't on some sport's team, you weren't going to get a good grade on it.
Almost every essay we wrote in that class were along the lines of "in YOUR OPINION, what does this or that mean and/or represent in the real world" (it was a mythology class)... now usually that means they want your opinion and by defention, your opinion shouldn't be wrong. My opinion was constantly wrong. I wrote 3 pages on Beowolf and what he was fighting, and what I thought the monster really was... and I got an F because I didn't think it was an earthquake.... in my opinion, I didn't think it was. And on the final, I got an F there too. The paper said to pick a story from our text book and analize it. The reason I got an F is because I picked out a story that we didn't read as a class.... so I got punished for reading more of my text book than anyone else.

To me, that's the kind of teacher that bites. Not one that's trying to get you to be creative. I take a teacher that wants us to draw clothing on trees any day over one who think student who do sports should have better treatment over the kids that don't. (even worse when they have to find something to give you a bad grade on)

[JPSloan]

In my last semester of college, I took a creative writing class for kicks. I did pretty well in the class, until I turned in my assignment for our first official short story (everything had been vignettes and scenes until that point).

I turned in a 27 page story which was basically very noir, very pulpy, very John Woo. What have you. Hitmen and broads and slick docks and verandas... that kind of thing.

After the assignment, the rest of the class would critique your story in front of you, and you're not allowed to defend yourself or say anything. All the classmates did was to gush over it and talk about their favorite parts. One of them actually greeted me in the doorway with a handshake and said, "That is a fine piece of pulp fiction, my friend."

Made me feel good. Until the teacher spoke up. She failed it. She referred to it as "good writing, possibly even publishable... but it is derivative in the extreme". I found out after I was done with her class that she was a rather outspoken literary critic against genre fiction. Anyone who wrote anything that could slip into genre was failed. Period.

I retooled midclass, and turned in two more stories and my final which were all exactly as she wanted. So, lesson learned... it doesn't matter how good you are or how popular, if the right people don't like it, you're hosed.

Later, I took another course by correspondence, with a published genre author as my grader/advisor. When I told him the story, he wrote back: "And whoever this moron is, who told you not to write what you want to write, deserves a swift kick in the ass."

[Chibiartstudios]

Oooh! That assignment sounds fun. I want to try it myself. I say start a thread of these! Who's with me?

And I LIKE some restrictions on my writing actually. It gives me freedom to play lawer and bend the rules. If the instructor says "draw/write a western scene" then I may churn out something like trigun. It's all in how you look at the assignment really. Though teachers that begrudge originality and creativity do piss me off. Though I'll forgive most high school teachers as the goal at that level is not to teach people to write creatively but to have them write well. As in, not l337.

But still. Trees with clothes sounds neat.

[Luprand]

As for english courses simply teaching the mechanics of writing - eh. You have no idea how many people are out there who don't know that stuff.

Tell me about it ... I have a 25-year-old in my apartment who still has to have me go over his papers to correct any number of spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors. As my sister puts it, "We're getting a new generation of kids who think that if there isn't a green squiggle underneath it, it's okay." And that's sad, especially since I've had MS Word find some grammar errors in my writing that turned out not to be errors at all.

I hate diagramming sentences as much as the next person, but some basic grammar and spelling isn't as difficult as the average netbuffoon would have you believe.

--Sij

[Chibiartstudios]

>_>

<_<

>_>

...Colosseum

[Luprand]

Colosseum

Have a cookie.

--Sij

[Kevin Wolf]

As for the creative writing whinge...anyone can write something creatively from absolutely nothing and go nuts with it. True creativity is taking what's already there and making it your own. I'd say that's why you were given guidelines about what to write about.

But then, I only teach ten year olds...what would I know, eh?

I disagree with your notion that anybody can create something of value from a blank canvas. Taking what's there and making it your own is certainly an aspect of creativity, but true "creativity" is making something from nothing. I understand the importance of guidelines as a specific creative excercise, or to occasionally kickstart the stubborn juices. What I don't understand, or appreciate, is having limitations foisted upon me every single time.

Edit-- Sloan and CJ: The horror! What crappy-ass teachers.

[Pimpette]

Erg, I shut off grammar and Check-Spelling-As-You-Type when I write. Most of the words it highlights are names, and it's really distracting to be in a groove, so to speak, and get distracted by all the red and green squiggles all over the place.

Damn you, Word!

[Dutch!]

Okay...here's two examples of writing activities I get the kids to do once or twice each term.

First, I put a quick topic on the board such as 'a tree and some clothing' (heh heh) and tell them to start writing anything but it has to include them somewhere. After about five minutes, I write something else on the board and they have to incorporate it into the story. Do this about four times and you've had the kids writing madly for thirty minutes. They love it.

Second, I write part of a sentence on the board and they have to finish it however they like. Then they fold the page over so it can't be seen, pass it on to the next person, and get one in return. Then I write half of the next sentence, and they can finish it however they like on the new piece of paper. Usually we do this six times and at the end have 25 stories that make absolutely no sense whatsoever, but have them rolling in the aisles.

Would you prefer writing assignments of that sort?[/i]

[McDuffies]

Erg, I shut off grammar and Check-Spelling-As-You-Type when I write. Most of the words it highlights are names, and it's really distracting to be in a groove, so to speak, and get distracted by all the red and green squiggles all over the place.

Damn you, Word!

I get distracted when it highlights my "Colour" and "favourite"...

[Sput]

Erg, I shut off grammar and Check-Spelling-As-You-Type when I write. Most of the words it highlights are names, and it's really distracting to be in a groove, so to speak, and get distracted by all the red and green squiggles all over the place.

Damn you, Word!

I get distracted when it highlights my "Colour" and "favourite"... :-?

switch to a british dictionary :D

sswhat i did. either that or i just abuse the add function. >X3

[Tanjou]

...What the bloody hell?! We turned in the assignment today and I was the only one who drew clothes on the tree! One person made wannabe Ents with bow... and the other person put a single sock on the branch...

(Oh, and I actually did the other version with lingerie! My teacher now thinks I am a freak.)

[Tanjou]

Second, I write part of a sentence on the board and they have to finish it however they like. Then they fold the page over so it can't be seen, pass it on to the next person, and get one in return. Then I write half of the next sentence, and they can finish it however they like on the new piece of paper. Usually we do this six times and at the end have 25 stories that make absolutely no sense whatsoever, but have them rolling in the aisles.[/i]

I did that in my 10th grade class. I had a lovely begining and everyone ruined it afterwards. (There was a barfight with knights!) But it was very fun.

[Kevin Wolf]

Okay...here's two examples of writing activities I get the kids to do once or twice each term.

First, I put a quick topic on the board such as 'a tree and some clothing' (heh heh) and tell them to start writing anything but it has to include them somewhere. After about five minutes, I write something else on the board and they have to incorporate it into the story. Do this about four times and you've had the kids writing madly for thirty minutes. They love it.

Second, I write part of a sentence on the board and they have to finish it however they like. Then they fold the page over so it can't be seen, pass it on to the next person, and get one in return. Then I write half of the next sentence, and they can finish it however they like on the new piece of paper. Usually we do this six times and at the end have 25 stories that make absolutely no sense whatsoever, but have them rolling in the aisles.

Would you prefer writing assignments of that sort?[/i]

Those are fun, and certainly valuable for getting kids excited about writing. But I was in a high school elective Creative Writing class, had been writing stories since Kindergarten (no classics, to be sure, but I was doing it), and just found all of the hand-holding to cramp my style. My perspective is, if we signed up for a Creative Writing class, we must already enjoy writing. Don't teach us how to write; we already know how to do that. Teach us how to write well.

[Luprand]

My perspective is, if we signed up for a Creative Writing class, we must already enjoy writing.

In a perfect world, I couldn't agree with you more. But given that most people in a Creative Writing class (at least at the school I went to) are there so they can tell the school counselor they're taking enough credits to be counted as a student for the year. My senior year was like that; I'd taken almost all the required classes I needed and had to pad my schedule with things I wasn't good at, but vaguely interested in.

--Sij

[Dutch!]

Teach me to write well, but don't teach me what to write or how to write it.

No matter which way I turn it, it still doesn't make sense!

[Keffria]

There's nothing I hate more than guidelines. Especially when they're teaching you how to write poetry. Which shouldn't be possible anyway, but there ya go. God I hated creative writing. *shudder*

There are times when rigidity is a good thing. The best course I ever took in high school was The Writer's Craft, and throughout the poetry unit, we were forced to use very specific (and sometimes very complicated) rhyme and rhythm schemes, or to incorporate specific techniques. But knowing how to write properly in iambic pentameter or how to write a chant royale or a metaphysical conceit is far more useful (and impressive) than just knowing how to string together random words.

(Of course, I won't mention the course I dropped because the teacher refused to accept an assignment on which I'd done extra work and therefore "hadn't followed instructions".)

[Kevin Wolf]

There's nothing I hate more than guidelines. Especially when they're teaching you how to write poetry. Which shouldn't be possible anyway, but there ya go. God I hated creative writing. *shudder*

We had a poetry assignment in my class, of course. It was to write a Shakespearean sonnet, quite possibly the most rigid and unforgiving poetic format in existence.

Another time, out assignment was to write new lyrics to the song "Proud Mary" by Creedence Clearwater Revival. I did a satirical song about the Exxon Valdez oil spill (yes, I was in high school way the hell back then), but because my teacher couldn't figure out to exactly fit my lyrics into the cadence of the original song, I didn't get a good grade.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not bitching about grades. I aced this class. I always found enough wiggle room to do something fun. Unfortunately, finding that wiggle room was the only thing creative I did in this class. The restrictions didn't "challenge" me or open my mind to new writing possiblities. They just frustrated me and held me back. I learned nothing about writing I didn't already know before taking the class, unless you count how to write in iambic pentameter (and boy, have I used that skill more times than I can count!).

I don't think I should be taught at the same level as some jock looking to score an "easy A" when I'm actually serious about the craft and looking to improve my skills.

[MariaAndMichelle]

Michelle had an awful Drawing and Painting class teacher in eleventh grade... very full of herself even though she didn't really know what she was doing. She asked Michelle if she planned to take another art course in twelfth grade. Michelle said she planned to take Cartooning and Animation II (she took C&A I in tenth grade), and her teacher replied with a little dissapointed noise and said "But that's not really an art class."

It took a lot of willpower not to say "Neither was yours."