The Best Revenge

[Dburkhead]

It is said that living well is the best revenge.

On a Usenet group I follow, someone who has a bit of an "attitude" (it's a martial arts group, go figure) posted to make some snide comments about Cold Servings.

The result was at least a dozen hits on the comic referred just from that thread in Google groups.

I can't think of any better revenge for "bad reviews" than "more readers."

[Ghastly]

I can't think of any better revenge for "bad reviews" than "more readers."

Threesome with Cameron Diaz and Lucy Liu.

[Mimo]

well they say any publicity is good publicity....look at Paris Hilton

[Steverules]

I thought of an idea to get thousands of hits in just a few days. I read Maddox, best page on the internet. What if I copied one of his rants, pasted it on my page pawning it off as my own and dropped him an note saying "Hey, check this site out. This dude totally ripped you off." Then he'd post a rant about how I suck, posting a link to my site to show the world how I ripped him off. Then I could post how brilliant I am because I just got a ton of free promotion. I wouldn't do it with Mojo cause it ain't nothing special but I may do it with Domino Lane when it debuts.
Hey, don't nobody steal my idea!

[Dburkhead]

I can't think of any better revenge for "bad reviews" than "more readers."

Threesome with Cameron Diaz and Lucy Liu.

And how many readers do you think I could get with that story?

[Steverules]

I can't think of any better revenge for "bad reviews" than "more readers."

Threesome with Cameron Diaz and Lucy Liu.

And how many readers do you think I could get with that story?

Who cares about readers? I'd take the threesome if it meant ending my strips completely.

[Wp]

Goddang, Ghastly, Lucy Liu is friggin nasty. I'd take Cameron, though.

[Warren]

I can't think of any better revenge for "bad reviews" than "more readers."

Burning down their house and pissing on the ashes comes to mind.

[Dburkhead]

Threesome with Cameron Diaz and Lucy Liu.

And how many readers do you think I could get with that story?

Who cares about readers? I'd take the threesome if it meant ending my strips completely.

The late Isaac Asimov was once asked which he would rather give up: sex or writing. His answer: "I can type 10 hours a day without getting tired."

But then, in another instance he was approached by a woman with a cigarette at a party once and jerked his head back out of the smoke. The woman said, "You don't smoke, do you?" to which he replied, "No, I don't." She then said, "I bet you don't drink either" to which he replied, "as a matter of fact, I don't" [not strictly true--very rarely he would have a drink]. The woman's next question was "What do you do?" Asimov's reply was, IMO, one of the great answers of all time. "Well, I fuck a lot."

Perhaps that line about typing 10 hours a day was a bit less than honest.

[Kirb]

I thought of an idea to get thousands of hits in just a few days. I read Maddox, best page on the internet. What if I copied one of his rants, pasted it on my page pawning it off as my own and dropped him an note saying "Hey, check this site out. This dude totally ripped you off." Then he'd post a rant about how I suck, posting a link to my site to show the world how I ripped him off. Then I could post how brilliant I am because I just got a ton of free promotion. I wouldn't do it with Mojo cause it ain't nothing special but I may do it with Domino Lane when it debuts.
Hey, don't nobody steal my idea!

*steals*

[Levi-chan]

I thought of an idea to get thousands of hits in just a few days. I read Maddox, best page on the internet. What if I copied one of his rants, pasted it on my page pawning it off as my own and dropped him an note saying "Hey, check this site out. This dude totally ripped you off." Then he'd post a rant about how I suck, posting a link to my site to show the world how I ripped him off. Then I could post how brilliant I am because I just got a ton of free promotion. I wouldn't do it with Mojo cause it ain't nothing special but I may do it with Domino Lane when it debuts.
Hey, don't nobody steal my idea!

*steals*

*meta-steals Kirb's stealing*

[Ghastly]

Goddang, Ghastly, Lucy Liu is friggin nasty. I'd take Cameron, though.

Lucy Liu is HOT! And those freckles across her cheekbones are uber-cute.

Cameron Diaz is very hot too.

Both of them doing me... it's a mobius loop of hotness.

[Risky]

OMG, somebody totally ripped off your idea! Let me find the link as soon as I'm done updating.

People did that to Flem a few times. Worked too.

[Anywherebuthere]

well they say any publicity is good publicity....look at Paris Hilton

PLEASE don't make me look at Paris Hilton again, I saw to much of her in that porn video as is.

[Anywherebuthere]

It is said that living well is the best revenge.

I can't think of any better revenge for "bad reviews" than "more readers."

I donno, screwing his wife AND his barely legal daughter, IN his porsche, and getting the smell to permiate the leather interior...I'ld think that would be a pretty decent start.

[Rkolter]

The best revenge would be to string him up in your basement and feed him via IV.

Then, once a day bring a small grill down to the basement.

Start up the grill and let it get hot. Warm a poker in the grill.

Cut a small piece of him off. A toe, a finger, what have you. Then cauterize the wound with the poker.

Finally, cook and eat the piece you removed. Then clean up, take the grill away, go upstairs, turn out the lights, and close the door until tomorrow.

[Psiogen]

...

*avoids rkolter*

[Anywherebuthere]

The best revenge would be to string him up in your basement and feed him via IV.

Then, once a day bring a small grill down to the basement.

Start up the grill and let it get hot. Warm a poker in the grill.

Cut a small piece of him off. A toe, a finger, what have you. Then cauterize the wound with the poker.

Finally, cook and eat the piece you removed. Then clean up, take the grill away, go upstairs, turn out the lights, and close the door until tomorrow.

Meh, feels like it's been done before.

Now murdering his sons and baking them into a pie....wait, nope nope, that's to shakespearian.

Making a TAPE of you haveing a threesome with his wife and daughter, and then RELEASING it as a porn video....now THAT'S usin' the ole Noggin.

Not only do you get your revenge, BUT you can make a quick buck as well. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

[Beyonder_alpha]

The best revenge would be to string him up in your basement and feed him via IV.

Then, once a day bring a small grill down to the basement.

Start up the grill and let it get hot. Warm a poker in the grill.

Cut a small piece of him off. A toe, a finger, what have you. Then cauterize the wound with the poker.

Finally, cook and eat the piece you removed. Then clean up, take the grill away, go upstairs, turn out the lights, and close the door until tomorrow.

make the room soundproof and pitchblack, play non stop loud music while filling the room with smoke, giving both a constant hyperventilation effect and a certain kind of highness at the same time making them suffer more from the loud music.
If you're using a wireframe to lipt the target up, lower it a little, just enough to have the tip of his feet in a giant container filled with water and leeches. protect the rest of the body and burn the bloodflow vessels of both his feet to prevent major bloodloss if the leeches would leave too many open wounds, insert a needle with fresh blood just after the burn mark to make the nerve endings fully operational but in an artificial way.
So as long as he keeps his feet up, he won't get leeches, if he puts his feet down he will literally feel the life being drained from him( use an extra big bag of spare blood if you tend to use a lot of leeches).

Just one of the few ways to get back in a minor way.

Also, rkolter, that's just sick man, eating his toes? I mean really... think of all the fungi, now if you were forcefeeding it to the target itself, sure, but eating it yourself? I mean really...

[Dburkhead]

<Slowly backing away from he folk at Keenspace (or whatever it's called this week)>