The 2030 predictions time capsule thread

[Toxic]

All right, so we did okay the last time around doing this, let's guess 2030 and check back in ten years to see how we did.

*Despite The Rise of Skywalker being billed as the definitive end of the Skywalker Saga, we’re going to get Episode X before decade’s end, revealing that Luke has a few Force kids produced from various one-night stands. Also, people will slowly come around to The Last Jedi and realize it's pretty darn good.

*The Dems will get their own Trump in the form of President Kanye West in 2024.

*iPhones will ditch Lightning ports in 2021, all buttons by 2024, screens by 2028, and will operate as thought crystals like that recent episode of Rick and Morty.

*Queen Elizabeth will still be on the throne and will have outlived Charles.

*Netflix will win the streaming wars because doing a Disney & Chill won’t really catch on.

*After the success of the MCU crossovers will be all the rage. The Fast and the Furious Meets Jurassic Park will be a thing. So will Lethal Weapon Meets Die Hard. And something totally bizarre like Crazy Rich Asians Meet Harry Potter.

*The media industry will collapse after most people decide they’re more interested in watching YouTube vloggers and amusing dogs on Instagram than professional movies and TV shows.

*Dating apps will make us so loose that sexy times on the first date won’t be considered trampy as long as it was a really good first date.

*Early 2000s nostalgia will be a thing.

*Bitcoin will hit $1 million at some point. Or nothing. One or the other.

*George RR Martin will still be working on ASOIAF.

[Toxic]

And other people:

Now for my 2030 prediction: The movies all get remade again as Holo-films. Just like 3D movies, they’re super popular for like 2 years. And just like 3D movies, everyone gets bored with them when they realize they actually look worse than regular movies. They linger on only as a novelty and a way for theaters to sell $100 movie tickets.

And then I waste 45 minutes trying to figure out something clever to predict for 2040.

By 2030, the Berne Convention will have been amended so that all creative works immediately become property of Disney-Time-Warner corporation.

2030, the avg american will weight 300 lbs and cat food will out sell baby food. amazon, disney and google will merge into one company and pretty much continue to suck at everything they do.
the entire english language will be banned, this won't be a problem since humans will have stopped talking to each other.

[Cope]

All right, so we did okay the last time around doing this, let's guess 2030 and check back in ten years to see how we did.

Hopefully. Chris Crosby won't have noticed he's still footing the server bill by then.

[VileTerror]

"Dating apps will make us so loose that sexy times on the first date won’t be considered trampy as long as it was a really good first date."
Wut?

We can do better than that!
"A good first date (not that anyone is "dating" any more, unless they're over 55 years old) will involve multiple-penetrative and/or cuddle consentacles."