Beating your meat, fish, and veggies - Explained

[Honor]

shlees are my favorite type of pasta... they ar e fun to play with.

While I agree that shlees are fun, if "fun to play with" were the primary criteria I judged food by, boobies and vaginas would top the list.

Kenryoku's End to a Miserable Day

Sounds delisheosus And welcome..! We've heard a lot about you

[Goddessmisca]

shlees are my favorite type of pasta... they ar e fun to play with.

While I agree that shlees are fun, if "fun to play with" were the primary criteria I judged food by, boobies and vaginas would top the list.

And they don't top the list of things you like to put in your mouth?

[Tellner]

Surprisingly enough the very best cherry pie in the world comes from the kitchen of Susie Bright. The recipe is in Mommy's Little Girl: On Sex, Motherhood, Porn and Cherry Pie. She calls it Eternal Devotion Cherry Pie.

My wife is a fanatic about cherries. I've seen her drive 100 miles to get the first really ripe ones from the Yakima valley farmers. And she'll eat two pounds on the way home.

One of these pies, which includes three pounds (!!) of Bings and Queen Annes, satisfies her cherry craving until the next Summer roles around. I swear by Cthulhu, it's true. It tastes more of cherries than the fruit itself.

[RavenxDrake]

Fresh fruit, and deserts created form same, are some of the greatest things on the earth.

I would give ANYTHING to have the woods I used to have behind the house I grew up in back... 3-5 acers filled with wild blackberry and raspberry briars and Muscadine vines(You may also know them as Scupernongs, wild grapes with a sweet, almost chewy center and lots juice in a really thick skin). Plus a pair of golden apple trees...

Even to this day I can't stand most "storebought" fruit except for apples and citrus....

[Tellner]

I would give ANYTHING to have the woods I used to have behind the house I grew up in back... 3-5 acers filled with wild blackberry and raspberry briars and Muscadine vines(You may also know them as Scupernongs, wild grapes with a sweet, almost chewy center and lots juice in a really thick skin). Plus a pair of golden apple trees...

Where was this? It could almost be Western Oregon.

If you get a chance, try the Arkansas Black apple. It's got a very dark skin a wonderful aroma, and the most delicious winey taste of any apple I've ever had.

[Honor]

Boring pre-story: A Food Network commercial I saw today aluded to programming about travel and lifestyle and... whatever, and ended with the tagline something like "The Food Network: ...way more than just cooking." which annoyed me quite a bit. I was like "Fuck that. I want just cooking. It's the goddamned food network. If I want travel tips, I'll watch the travel channel and if I want "lifestyle tips" I'll watch HGTV or The Learning Channel, since it was perhaps the first to jump ship and change formats from actual science and learning to redecorating and losing weight... (Actually, if I ever find myself wanting anything as mindless sounding as "lifestyle tips", I think I'll just shoot myself in the head and get it over with.)

I hate this. We were headed toward this wonderful abundance of specialized cable channels... It was really looking like it might be great, and then suddenly they all started thinking they should be a little bit of everything to everyone. Bastardi

Anyway. The cooking related post:

Ever do one of those things that surprises you twice? "Wow. This is really good." and then "Waitaminnit... Why haven't I tried this before?"

Well, I was in a store that had a really good sale on ground beef that was far more lean than I would usually put up with. I demand little things like flavor from my meats, but this sale made this stuff about half the price of real (85% lean) ground beef, so I had to buy it.

So I cooked some up to eat popcorn style, cause I do that sometimes... And it's a little too dry. So then I'm thinking, I have to put it in something... And I think of this beautiful fresh hot salsa I bought Wednesday. (Another one of my favorite treats... You have to go to a hispanic/mexican market or a mexican resturant and get the really thin resturant chips for real chips and salsa... commercial corn chips from the major manufacturers are as thick as rawhide.)

So yeah, I think, this stuff has almost no fat in it, so it won't grease up in the cold salsa... Why not?

So I mixed well seasoned pre-cooked ground beef in with fresh salsa, about 50/50... Mixed it up thoroughly and then I got a little monkey bowl of really fine-shredded colby to put on top of the bowl every so often. I heated up my wonderful resturant corn chips in the microwave for 45 seconds.

Wow. It was hella yummy.

So that's the whole <strike>recipe</strike> tip: Put lean ground beef directly in the fresh salsa. Add fine-shred cheese on top if you want.

Chips and salsa becomes a complete meal, without resorting to "nachos", which I've always liked in theory and never liked in practice.

And now, response notes

But... Spicy and Pickeled.... those two go so well together... especially In refridgerator pickles... a Hobby of mine. My personal favourites right now are Firecrackers(a Recipe I lifted from Good Eats), and a Hot and Sweet Asian Fruit pickles recipe I'm working on...

Alton Brown, at around... 85-90%, is probably the "celebrity chef" I agree with most often. He's wonderful. Every now and then he puts forth a flavor combination that's just a little too clever for my tastes, but in all, I find him wonderful. I love the way he goes at problems from a more scientific, intellectual direction.

The recipe you're working on below that sounds really cool... I have two refrigerators here (well, my room-mate and I) and the second one is usually at least half filled with my pickles... Both home-made and storebought. I sometimes joke that if you pickled rabbit poops in spicy vinegar, I'd probably eat 'em.

My contribution to this thread: tomato sauce...

*purrs* Gotta love anyone who'll treat pasta and red sauce as the holy sacrament it rightfully is. Sounds wonderful.

And they don't top the list of things you like to put in your mouth?

Well... They, uh... Well... Yeah. But food...

[Lowky]

So I mixed well seasoned pre-cooked ground beef in with fresh salsa, about 50/50... Mixed it up thoroughly and then I got a little monkey bowl of really fine-shredded colby to put on top of the bowl every so often. I heated up my wonderful resturant corn chips in the microwave for 45 seconds.

Wow. It was hella yummy.

Reminds me of a easy yummy recipe off the back of can (might have been bottle)

1 can refried beans. 1 jar salsa

mix salsa into beans, heat

Add some shredded colby jack (or cheese of choice)

Serve with the nice rawhide thick corn chips (frito's type, not tortillia chips).

Cheap, easy, yummy, and a full meal

[RavenxDrake]

Where was this? It could almost be Western Oregon.

If you get a chance, try the Arkansas Black apple. It's got a very dark skin a wonderful aroma, and the most delicious winey taste of any apple I've ever had.

Actually, it was North Carolina. We have alot of farmland out here(hell, everything in the state's that's not Sking mountains or Beach is Farmland, just about, prob 3/4 of the state. With fucking Hightech Central sandwitched in the middle of the state with the Research Triangle). But we have good soil for Muscadines(if you happen to be able to find them, check your local wine secialty shop for Duplin brand wines... they have booth red and white muscadine/scuppernong wines...).

I'll keep an eye for those... generally speaking I prefer either a mellow, mild apple, or a tart, almost spicy apple. I really like Gala's and Fuji's... but I'm always up for more.


And Honor:

I really like Alton Brown, too... I think I've learned more "Whys" about cooking than "How's" from his show... and personally, I think that's more important for a home chef who's not going to shell out big bucks for "professional cooking lessons"... learning the reasons a recipe succeeds or fails not only helps you cook better "by the numbers", but gives you a better base for experiments and new things...

I tend to make my own salsa and guacamole... but mostly because, since we have a large mexican-american poplulation around here, chile's, avacados, tomatilla's, and other highly specific "ethnic" items are easier to come by.

But I HATE only haveing decent tomatos in the summer. Storebought, so-called "fresh, ripe tomatos" are neither... and practically unfit to eat.

[Jackalope]

Do they not sell "on the vine" tomatos where you are? I've found those are the only store-bought tomatos that are worth buying at all.

[Tellner]

They sell those here. But they have something even better - Certified organic heirloom tomatoes. All different varieties from one that looks like a little watermelon to huge knobby Brandywines. Utter heaven.

[Caduceus]

Here is a tip. Tired of making cheese dip with Velveeta? Convinced you can't get real cheese to melt right? I had to do some experiementation because processed foods give me a tummy-ache. I came up with this:

First, finely shread your cheese. You can buy bagged shredded cheese if you want. You want it so it melts as fast as possible.

Next, throw a can of evaporated (not condensed!) milk into a saucepan. Use however much you want, but know that one of those large cans will make a crapload of dip.

Heat it; it needs to be hot but not all the way up to a boil. If it gets truly hot, your cheese with seperate into solids and oils. You can put some salsa or whatever in if you like.

Introduce the cheese slowly, stirring a lot. As soon as you have enough cheese to your taste, take it off the heat. Serve. Voila.

The trick here is that the condensed milk has the fat content and density to really mix with the cheese, not needing an outside binder like flour or corn starch. Tasty.

[Kenryoku]

Here is a favorite of Starwind's. So difficult to, let me tell you !
Hope you are paying attention, this is rough for even the best:

1. Make favorite pasta of choice (angel hair in this house)
2. Once made drain pasta and place into large frying pan (you know your "Hamburger Helper" pans)
3. Put on medium high heat and add favorite red sauce (original Prego in this house)
4. Stir frequently and reduce sauce until it just begins to get sticky
5. Turn off heat and quickly apply a layer of finely shreaded Colby Jack (liberally as to taste)
6. Cover and let stand for 3 minutes to melt cheese
7. Dig in

Works well with penne, shells, macaroni, and other "cupped" pasta ! Just be warned that cupped pasta retains moisture better so it will take longer to reduce the sauce. If you have a particularly watery sauce or cupped pasta you might consider not cooking all the way through so that during the sauce reducing step the pasta can finish cooking then and not get overcooked otherwise.

Edit: Just remembered to add this ... dont do this with white sauce like alfredo ! Part of the quality of white sauces is their creamy/smooth textures and reducing them to the point they are thick and/or sticky totally destorys their purpose. Stick to red sauces for this recipe.

[RavenxDrake]

Do they not sell "on the vine" tomatos where you are? I've found those are the only store-bought tomatos that are worth buying at all.

They do, but I used to work in prouduce, so I know even those aren't at peak. First off, they've been refridgerated. The primary cause of funkification in tomatos is refridgeration. The cold causes certain enzymes in the tomatoes to break down. Not only do they not taste right anymore, once they've been refridgerated(usually right after picking them, green) they won't RIPEN anymore. Oh, they'll turn shiny and red when you gas them with Ethylene(Which, point of fact, is produced in some degree by all plants, as well as being a naturally occuring hydrocarbon. It has powerful sedative and halucinatory properties. It was used in the 30's to the 60's as an anesthetic, and there are studies in place to suggest that naturally occuring pockets of this gas were actually the cause of the "visions" seen by the Oracles at Delphi.) but they won't be really RIPE... like Storebought strawberries.

Like many plants, they're picked green so that they can be shipped more easily, and then gassed with Ethylene before the final shipping out to the store so they ripen just as they get there. But tomatos handle this process very poorly, resulting in stale, dead, lifeless, but very firm, bright and shiny fruits. Making them pleasing to the eye, and thus actively bought by people who don't know better, or who have no other choice. I'd rather open a tin of Whole, peeled tomatos(most of which were picked ripe and sent straight to the factory) than a storebought tomato.

Anyone who's never had a tomato they just picked off the garden vine, sliced paper thin, and layered with salt and peper on lightly mayonaised sourdough toast has never truely lived.

They sell those here. But they have something even better - Certified organic heirloom tomatoes. All different varieties from one that looks like a little watermelon to huge knobby Brandywines. Utter heaven.

Those are great, if you can find them. As are any farmers marked type tomatos. Greenhouse tomatos(picked ripe on the vine and never refridgerated) are great as well.

[Moo Cow]

shlees are my favorite type of pasta... they ar e fun to play with.

While I agree that shlees are fun, if "fun to play with" were the primary criteria I judged food by, boobies and vaginas would top the list.

And they don't top the list of things you like to put in your mouth?

You crack me up, you two do.


Yay, Starwind's hubby is here with recipes!!!! *glomps him* welcome!

~Sara

[Wilmo]

Anyone make a list of instant ramen recipes?

I'll start.

Cook up ramen, as usual, but make it al dente, then drain it completely and pan-fry it with an egg in it, add the powder flavor (generally chicken, but whatever)

then bam!

Delicious

[Honor]

Ramen is am amazing thing... I've always been a huge fan. I've had friends call me, at various times and for various reasons, Ramen Queen or Iron Chef Ramen. I have a folder where I have the wrappers of dozens of kinds of ramen and instant noodle soups over the years, with notes as to quality, falvor, etc... From time to time I thought I should make a funny website about it. I always favored the second title, but I just checked to find someone had bought it.

[Kenryoku]

An interesting variation to ramen.
I recommend chicken flavored ramne for this.

1. Cook two packages of ramen noodles as per the packages
2. Quickly drain completely, just till the excess water is gone but the noodles are still surface wet
3. Add to noodles only one packet of ramen flavoring and butter/margerine to taste
4. Blend all ingrediants well and enjoy

Makes a very interesting sort of different ramen.
Not my recipe but still good.

[Goddessmisca]

Cook ramen noodles (1 pack) to whatever firmness you like with the powder in the water. Drain but perserve 1/4 cup of the liquid.

Heat up 1/2 cup random frozen mixed veggies in a fry pan, add 1/4 cup extra supr firm tofu and sprinkle with soy sauce and black pepper.
Add 2 tbs shi racha sauce (sp), and noodles. Toss them together then turn off the heat.

Add the reserved liquid and make sure it's all slippery. Squeeze a bit of lime juice over the top and enjoy.

Sometimes I also top it with a poached egg.

[Tellner]

It's even a sacred food of the Pastafarians, worshippers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

[Moo Cow]

microwave shitake mushrooms in water and use the water as flavoring for hte broth. Also you can use soup stock of your choice in stead of water, like homemade chicken or shrimp broth. Shrimp broth you can get by boiling the shrimp shells in water.

So, boil your broth, put in noodles, add chopped shitakes (after they're soft from microwaving) also break an egg in, stir in a little bit of smoked sesame oil... last minute add chopped scallions and seasoning to taste.

~Sara