the bad pick up line thread

Spiral Zer0 · Post by **Spiral Zer0** » Tue Jul 03, 2007 7:18 pm

me and a couple of friends were joking around a while ago about random bad pick up lines.

well today I thought about posting here and I was like, damn I should totally do this.

so

some bad pick up lines

"hey wanna get a pizza and fuck, what. you don't like pizza."
"hey nice shirt, do you come with it"
"I forgot my number can I have yours"
"hey mind if I use your cell, my name is *blank* what's yours. why do I ask, I'm going to call my mom to tell her I found the girl of my dreams"

so yeah, I kinda forgot alot of them but I'm sure you guys have an idea as too how to keep this train running

Jpnadia · Post by **Jpnadia** » Tue Jul 03, 2007 7:33 pm

Of course we do.

Aeridus · Post by **Aeridus** » Tue Jul 03, 2007 7:46 pm

That last panel is just so priceless.

Here's my contribution:
*after sniffing the target's hair* "Wow, you smell nice, mind if I have a taste?"

*after spilling a drink on her pants* "Oops, my bad. Here, let me help you out of those."

"Are you my sister? Because you and I should live together."

"I think my cock is attracted to your black hole, and I'm at the event horizon. Watch out!"

Lowky · Post by **Lowky** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 3:48 am

My name is *blank*, remember it you will be screaming it later.

Nice dress I bet it would look even better on the floor next to my bed.

How do you like your eggs scrambled or fertilized?

Orwell · Post by **Orwell** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 7:00 am

A lovely outfit to be sure, but you know what would look even better? My cock in your *orifice*.

I forget the proper way it was phrased, but I was rather amused by "You must be stalking me. I see you every night in my dreams."

Cryogenick · Post by **Cryogenick** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 7:53 am

Baby...If you were a booger, id pick you first.

-cryo

Squidflakes · Post by **Squidflakes** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 8:03 am

Did an angel fall from heaven? Cause you've got nice cans.

Reesa-chan · Post by **Reesa-chan** » Sun Jul 08, 2007 9:00 pm

I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

...my favorite bad pick-up line ever ^_^

Major Maxillary · Post by **Major Maxillary** » Sun Jul 08, 2007 11:22 pm

"Hey there. I saw you from across the park, and I would just like to ask you if I could wear your vagina like a hat."

"This flag is presented on behalf of the United States Army and a grateful nation for the honorable and faithful service rendered by your loved one. I understand that you're single now..."

Churba · Post by **Churba** » Sun Jul 08, 2007 11:40 pm

"Hey baby, was your daddy a Thief? Because that's totally my car you parked outside."

PopeMac · Post by **PopeMac** » Mon Jul 09, 2007 4:27 am

"Nice shoes, wanna fuck?"

Works every time.

Squidflakes · Post by **Squidflakes** » Mon Jul 09, 2007 2:57 pm

You must have been running though my mind all day, cause you're sweating like a pig right now.

WangyJohn · Post by **WangyJohn** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 4:36 am

Is there a mirror in your pants, because I can totally see myself in them.

Honor · Post by **Honor** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 1:28 pm

I've actually used "So... Wanna fuck?" and had it work. More than once.

Most of my favorite pick-up lines have been delivered by others on my (unrequested) behalf, though... Like my one friend telling the girl I was completely unreasonable unless I got a pussy in my mouth every now and then...

Or, when this cute little girl, probably quite new to going to the "grown up parties" and feeling her oats used a pick-up line on me - "I can tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue... What can you do?" and my friend, who was walking by said, without missing a step "Honey, she can tie you in a knot with her tongue."

Then you get the whole extra level... How do you deliver a pick-up line that serves the purpose of finding out if she's into girls, and registering your interest if she is?

Fireydragon · Post by **Fireydragon** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 1:42 pm

I just have to share one that got used on me..

it went along the lines of 'I like a couple of women.. you're one of them.. so if you wanna, you know.. do stuff, that would be awesome.. and if you don't.. no worries, I'll try one of the others'

Peaches · Post by **Peaches** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 5:07 pm

*hand them a packet that says 'sugar'* Excuse me, but it seems you dropped your name tag.

MistressMaggie · Post by **MistressMaggie** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 6:47 pm

I've discovered that "I think you should come home with me tonight" does not work for me, unfortunately.

RavenxDrake · Post by **RavenxDrake** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 7:18 pm

"I'm sorry, I lost my virginity... I was wondering if I could use yours?"

*slap*

"That's cool... what about just the box it came in?"

WangyJohn · Post by **WangyJohn** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 8:16 am

Hail to the king, baby!

Aeridus · Post by **Aeridus** » Sat Jul 14, 2007 5:38 am

Honor wrote:Or, when this cute little girl, probably quite new to going to the "grown up parties" and feeling her oats used a pick-up line on me - "I can tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue... What can you do?" and my friend, who was walking by said, without missing a step "Honey, she can tie you in a knot with her tongue."

Your friends know you a little *too* well...