I tried to kill myself today...

[CatGuyEz8]

i don't wanna sound corny but oh well im glad to see so many people are helping. see mike you do have friends and we care for you. your not alone and don't give up. no matter what you do you always have complete control over your life even if it dosen't seem like it you just need to realize what you need to do.

[Ophelia]

I know I am slightly late on this, but after reading all the other posts I have felt the desire to share and empathize.<br>Just this month I came very close to killing myself. I wanted to die so very very badly and I felt like all I needed was for one person to say "fine. Go ahead and just do it." and I could. Fortunately no one let me get away with that... Instead, though, I cut myself. I have permanent scars of words like "alone" peppering my legs as a reminder of how far gone I was and to never let myself get there again. Some cutters wear their scars with pride. I wear mine in the spirit of them being a reminder of what I cannot let myself do again. Nothing is worth that. No one is worth killing yourself over. Or mutilating yourself, or starving yourself over. I had to learn that the hard way, as, it seems, many others here did too.<br>I suppose that was why I wanted to share that slightly morbid rambling; I know that there are many of you who have felt as I did, and though I would never wish what I felt on anyone, it is better to know that I am not alone after all.<br>What all of us have shared may very well get one of us through one terrible night.<br>if any of you ever need someone to talk to, IM me if you wish @ Nymphothewood or OliviaDrowning. I would be more than willing to make sure that no one feels like any of us have again.

[Sins' Apprentice]

I was once in the same place as you. I considered suicide, but decided that I only had one thing to live for: taking revenge on those who stood in my way. When you feel like killing yourself, just imagine all those people that you don't like prancing around your grave, and continuing to taunt you. Now, are you going to let that happen, or will you live long enough until you have each one alone, so you can exact your revenge? Your choice.

[Rusc]

I've been depressed too, ever sinceI was a little kid, at night as earily as second grade I used to cry myself to sleep begging god to put me out of my misery... I never thought about sucide until I got older... I always was enrolled in small catholic schools, where I was the outcast, and it confused me since I was a perfectly nice person, I didn't gossip, I did have a big mouth, but all kids do, and I was a nice person... I went through jr high literally friendless, and things didn't get better in high school... well they got better since I got a job, and getting outta the house helped, if you don't have ajob get one, an easy one you can do well at it does wonders for self esteme. Anyway, when I was 17 after i had seen a counseler and discovered that I am not scum ofthe earth, but my dad pulled the funding 'cuz he doesn't believe in theorpy, I realized that my main problemswere my abusive father and brother. anyway, when I was a junior my dad had to go to europe for training for his job, i was happy when he was gone, but I dreaded the day he returned, infact i tried to kill myself that day to avoid having to see him ever again.. i had a knife from work and I cut at my wrists as hard as I could but I had the knife backwards (likeit could've cut anyway) so it just burned a lot so I gave up) .. anyway, I went to college far away, made friends, am in a wonderful relationship,. but now I'm back home because my father's an unforgiving asshole and i didn't do too well inmy hard engineering ciriculum that my dad pretty much forced me to take... but I'm going back next semester, whether he likes it or not....

Rusc

[Michael Ezaiany]

Welcome to the forum, Ophelia and Rusc!

[Arcaton]

Which engineering is that Rusc?